Caffeine struggle

July 5, 2021

I don't recall the last time I went without drinking coffee. In fact, I cannot even remember when I would just wake up and function properly without a caffeine boost. It's Thursday afternoon and all I can think about is how I'll make it through the day. Has my entire routine been shaped to rely upon that black stimulant? I struggle to concentrate, I feel lazy, I lack inspiration and my head seems dizzy and confused. I wouldn't be exaggerating if I said that a headache seems to be knocking on my door as well.

To avoid confronting a possibility that I might be addicted, I search for random tasks that don’t require the attention of my brain; that should also include staying away from my computer which is certainly not helping this irritant pounding head which, guess what, has just got worse! But then I think: there's no harm in a little bit of housework, right? The vacuum cleaner should save me now. By the way: the two of us had a blast that afternoon!

Is this what temperance is supposed to be? Is my body rejecting the absence of "ine" substances? I guess so. I wonder how meeting friends for a cup of coffee would mean from today onwards. Even those days made to sit in a café to inspire my inner writer might not work the same way. No matter how weird and difficult this feels, I'm determined to follow a new routine which has just been prescript by an Ayurveda expert to improve my wellbeing and likewise alleviate my everlasting monthly agony a.k.a. PMS. I am tired of feeling terrible for 10 days a month, every month, so I guess I'll do whatever it takes to make these unpleasant sensations go away.

Fast forward one week. My blood is coffee free and it feels surprisingly good. After the third day I think that I got used to it and it's not that bad after all. Don't know if it's because of some mental-physical benefits one should get from the absence of caffeine or simply the pride effect of being brave enough to endure a whole week that makes me feel great about it.

Either way, in order to honor my resilience, I then decide to pour myself a delicious, aromatic black coffee that no one does better than my old friend, Bialetti. By the way: it's decaf and it feels good!

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